What motivates you to get better, what makes you finish your work.

Amon · 2019-07-04 18:25:15

Why not to have a normal discussion once in a while.

Welcome there, dear friends of ohol.
There are often many hurdles in life, inhibition, depression, lack of muse and motivation.
Depression at lest to me was one of the worst, how does it feel to spend week after week after week laying and staring at the ceiling. Nothing in brain, nothing in soul. It took an extra notch of sadness when I thought I had depression under controll when it was actually just an episode of mania.

Those were...interesting learning experiences nonetheless, often placed among episodes of high creativity, killing them off prematurely.
Project after project lost.
A book never read to the end, a piece of art abandoned, a written work forever left behind, lines of code left unfinished.

But I learned as a painter in this year, even when I radically jumped from one idea to another. Often I would work on many paintings but promise to myself...Finish them.
Amon, finish those paintings.
Normally people would abandon such a piece, a failure is to be left forgotten or burned, yet I remember back a few years...
I was drawing, growing increasingly frustrated over a piece. I told the professor bluntly "I want to start anew." I knew if I began anew I would make it better, but my professor would not take it. He shut me down and told me: "Don't erase or start anew. Correct it."
"Correct it."

I trashed that artwork like any stubborn person of that age.
However, no subsequent piece was ever abandoned.
Now in the last semester there were these paintings. They were not an experience of bliss, they were active battles. While there were works done in a few hours, they were flat and lofty...breathy...transcendental in experience... there were those paintings that got repainted over and over and over again, I was never happy, never satisfied.
But I would correct them.
Like a maniac I would layer paint on them, trying to achieve a new level beyond mediocrity. Something to fullfill me.
And I would not stop. No...Never.
Any work left unfinished is a baggage on your soul. I have so many things waiting to be improved, fixed corrected, it is such a backlog of bad muse and thoughts. One has to free themselves of it.

Force yourself to complete things. Even if you hate it, loathe it, despise it to no end. Complete it. And over time patience grows stronger. Sucess motivates me, completing something motivates me. Now ... I don't even sketch anymore with a pencil. A mistake upon the paper is a mistake I learned to accept. I will complete it, and many people will love it.

And even then, you can find small truths in entertainment.
If you search far enough that is, thus I was always rather reluctant when reading any self helf books, often I'd just end up saying "I already know this from such and such". Life truly is the best teacher, but only if you truly want to learn.
How was it said? You can tell somebody every step to enlightnment, but they will never get enlightned. They have to find it in themselves.
But sometimes you also need a stubborn friend to bring your bouts of inhibition to a halt.

Jojigirl · 2019-07-04 18:39:39

Great post!! I can relate on so many different levels.

I've been dealing with depression since I was 13, I am 40 now. I too, thought I had it under control. Just recently I've fallen back into the depression cycle full force, out of the nowhere. It makes it even harder when you have a spouse who just doesn't understand, and it really is hard to explain it to someone whose never had to deal with it.

I deal with extreme anxiety also, when my depression comes forth, my anxiety is worse. It almost seems impossible to pull yourself out of it!

I love your outlook on it, it really gives me something to think about and try to implement. This month has been a real struggle for me, so Thank you for your post.

Amon · 2019-07-05 08:31:47

It's very depressing how early one can experience depression, it's not an enjoyable existance, worse if it's persistant throughout your life.
But we cope and we live. I am glad my text helped

RodneyC86 · 2019-07-05 08:34:30

Because there are people counting on me. I'm a simple man

One Hour One Life Forums

#1 2019-07-04 18:25:15

What motivates you to get better, what makes you finish your work.

#2 2019-07-04 18:39:39

Re: What motivates you to get better, what makes you finish your work.

#3 2019-07-05 08:31:47

Re: What motivates you to get better, what makes you finish your work.

#4 2019-07-05 08:34:30

Re: What motivates you to get better, what makes you finish your work.

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